Sunday, April 11, 2010

Pink Plastic Jesus, Take the Wheel

The weekend ended on a delightful and slightly hallucinogenic note when we finally got together with Ronnie and Jeff for dinner and drinks. We drove to their home for a pre-dinner cocktail. Once there, Ronnie mixed us a drink and we were deep in conversation and laughter. Now, about these cocktails....

Ronnie made these delicious drinks called Pineapple Upside Down Cakes. They involved vanilla vodka, pineapple juice, grenadine and brown sugar on the rim. They tasted redonkulously good and seemed frou-frou enough so imagine my surprise when after 1 1/2 drinks...well, I couldn't feel my feet. I swear I don't know what the unknown ingredient was in these elixirs but if I hadn't seen Ronnie mix these myself, I would've assumed he concocted them in some opium den hidden somewhere in the house. I was feeling inexplicably hammered and Keith later admitted it was the most inebriated he'd ever been....after one drink. At some point during this hazy time, Keith admired the pink, plastic Jesus on Ronnie's mantle. He brought us the Jesus which we soon found out had a hidden magic eight-ball inside and Ronnie encouraged us to ask it questions. Keith asked it what he was having for dinner and I asked it if I would ever stop overthinking things. Pink, plastic Jesus told us both to "beware of lightning." Whaaa...? Soon, I was wondering out loud about the whereabouts of the Big, Honking Jesus that loomed over Claycomo. It was a Godzilla-sized Son of God erected on someone's lawn that nearly made me wreck my car the first time I saw it and I noticed just today that it was gone. Apparently, it was moved due to outside pressure. The conversation eventually moved on to Keith's Catholic upbringing and I was beginning to sense that if we didn't stop the talking to and about false Jesuses on this day of the Sabbath that we would soon experience the forewarned lightning strikes. Finally, I just allowed myself to be mesmerized by the Hardy Boys lunchbox perched on the fridge.

So..after regaining some feeling in our extremities, we shanghaied Jeff into driving my car to the restaurant. We went to Smokebox BBQ in Liberty. The food was terrific and a perfect choice to soak up some of that pineapple mad juju punch. I had a combination of burnt ends and sausage with sides of barbecued beans, cole slaw and this totally addictive cheesy corn. Keith and Ronnie had enormous ribs or as Ronnie called them,"Flintstone ribs." I'm quite certain that in my zeal to absorb some alcohol that I probably had that wonderfully spicy BBQ sauce slung from my eyebrow to my chin to Keith's left ear.

It was so great to see and spend time with the boys again. However, next time Ronnie mixes the drinks, I'll know to pack an emergency stayover kit....just in case.

3 comments:

Ronnie said...

I was still a bit shakey despite the food two hours later. I'm not sure what made them so strong either. It was like something out of Requiem for a Dream meets the Oz poppy field. Lord in heaven!

Lisa Mandina said...

I'm going to have to get the recipe for that drink from Ronnie! That sounds awesome!!

And I have a Buddy Christ statue from the movie Dogma. Dogma is one of my favorite movies, and believe it or not, a while ago when I was in a not sure where I stood religiously time in my life, it got me back to church. So I keep my Buddy Christ out for that very reason.

Kristy said...

Ronnie is evil but he has great taste in home decor.

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